PEACE on EARTH

Lately I have been burdened by this need to get down to the Truth and get rid of this sugar-coated Christian life I have been leading. Somehow in the 8 years that I have known the Lord, I have allowed the Christian culture to seep into my life.....a culture that is more guided by the things of this world than by the Word......by what is popular and peace-keeping rather than what may bring persecution and conflict.

In my quiet time this morning I was struck, yet again by this same need. I have been going through the book of Matthew and this morning I came across Matthew 10:34-36.....

34 "Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. 36 And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household.

If I were to ask you, before reading this, if Christ came to bring peace on earth, what would your answer have been? Mine would have been a resounding YES. And the thoughts it would have brought about are those of everyone getting along......world peace, if you will.

But this is one of those lies our culture has taught us. We live in a peace-keeping society. We want to make everyone happy all of the time. We believe that because Christ is loving that means we are to be loving (peace-keeping).

When you take a closer look, you see that peace-keeping does not = love in the scriptures. You see that Christ did NOT come to bring peace BETWEEN men but FOR men. Christ came to bring peace to our souls, not to our society. Of course, if all people had Christ residing in their hearts, their would be world peace but scripture tells us that will not happen this side of heaven.

And from this I must take away a resolve to live in the TRUTH, to not always try to make everyone happy, and to not rely on what the Christian culture teaches me but to bathe myself in the Word so that it will reside in my heart.

Are you meek?

This is one I have IGNORED!

Meek- ˈmēk

1 : enduring injury with patience and without resentment : mild
2 : deficient in spirit and courage : submissive
3 : not violent or strong : moderate

These are completely against my nature.....just not my personality......or so I have told myself. Even when I was ON FIRE for the Lord, this was one I justified away. But is this not for ALL Christians? YES!

AND, the question arises, is this a possible characteristic to take on even in the midst of a rebuke? I believe the answer to this is YES as well! In fact, I would venture to say that it very well could be even MORE important in these situations.

Interestingly enough I find that the only time the word meekness is used (in the NIV) is in the context of a rebuke. In 1 Corinthians 10:1-3 Paul writes:

1By the meekness and gentleness of Christ, I appeal to you—I, Paul, who am "timid" when face to face with you, but "bold" when away! 2I beg you that when I come I may not have to be as bold as I expect to be toward some people who think that we live by the standards of this world. 3For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.

Is there still sternness? Does he try to "make peace"? I certainly don't think gentleness and meekness = peace maker.

I will have to work on this.

CHANGE

Life has become quite interesting.

Back in April I went into the hospital for pre-term labor and started a blog to keep everyone updated on what was going on. After getting out of the hospital and moving on with life I had people express interest in me continuing my blog. I was surprised to say the least but obliged, thankful for the opportunity to keep record of my kiddos childhood. That way, later in life when my kiddos ask about when they were little I certainly won't be able to remember, I can point them to the blog.

All of that said, I find it quite interesting that I completely forgot I had started THIS blog in February with lofty intentions. Clearly I fell through miserably. It seems that this has been the pattern of my life for far too long. BUT, God has His ways.....does He not? There is SOMETHING he wants me to get out there. He hasn't revealed His purpose in this yet, but I am certain He will and I so desire to be in the middle of His will.

I am ready for change.

I am tired of living as a diluted Christian. I want to live for Christ. I want my life to be a life that brings glory to the Kingdom and thus far it has been an ugly picture of that. I pray that I can use this blog as an outlet to my new life. As some sort of accountability. I pray that some might find a bit of comfort and encouragement in seeing my struggle against the evil one to make a REAL and lasting CHANGE!

The title of my blog still rings true to the desire of my heart......that I am no longer to conform to the patterns of this world. (Romans 12:2) This has become increasingly difficult in a culture of professed Christians who unashamedly live like the world.

Reminded

I stood in awe as I went to retrieve my mail today. I am certain I looked like a mad woman to the neighbor who happened to catch a glimpse at my beaming face.

It was the white envelope and the red envelope sitting in the mailbox that captured my attention. No, I was not excited because I thought my wonderful husband had finally GOT it.....that he had thoughtfully picked out Valentine's Day cards and mailed them to me......I knew they wouldn't be from him. BUT, I knew who they were from and that was just as much a blessing to my heart if not more so.

For a LONG time now.....at least as many years as I have been married (4 1/2) I have been praying for an older, mature Christian woman to mentor me. It has been a difficult process of growing in the Lord at times because I have never had a Christian example to follow simply because I did not grow up in a Christian home. It was always heavy on my heart to find someone who could lead me to be a fantastic Christian wife and mother.

I KNEW when asking for this, that I was praying in His will and He would be faithful to answer me. But after years had passed, I was beginning to wonder. It seemed that as time passed I needed this mentor more and more and there weren't even any prospects. I kept asking myself if I had not been proactive enough in looking and so there are things I took into my own hands trying desperatly to find this someone. Thankfully God made it so that no matter how much effort I put forth on my end, He was not ready for me to find this person.

In my mailbox today it was not simply the joy of receiving mail (which I do enjoy immensly) but the idea of what those envelopes might represent in my life. Can I just say that I think the Lord may have finally opened the door for this person, this mentor, to enter into my life. I can not say this with certainty but I do have to admit that she is incredible and I would have never found her without the divine intervention of the Lord. Through a very random pairing of "prayer partners" within our preschool leadership did I find this beautiful woman of the Lord. Since that time she has been thoughtful and caring and a precious example of what the Lord desires for us to be.

Those envelopes were such a sweet reminder that the Lord of this Universe is faithful and trustworthy! Thank you for being such a good God.

Totally Clueless

So, here goes one of the most awkward things I have yet to do. I feel as though the Lord has really been laying it on my heart to start a blog. The reason that is so strange is that I simply don't feel like I have anything to say and in addition to that important factor.....I am NOT a good writer. That's right folks.....I am not a good writer and I am starting a blog...hmmm.....God must have something up his sleeve.

As you may notice.....God has been whispering this in my ear now.....thus the post from a over a year ago and I have simply refused to respond with an affirmative. I honestly don't feel like I have time to start yet another project that will take up my "free" time but I am willing to follow what I feel like the Lord has laid upon my heart to see what his plans are.

I suppose my first thought is that he desires that we share what we learn spiritually. Well, he in lies a HUGE problem for me.....I don't think there is anyone out there who is interested in hearing what I am learning spiritually. This problem did not arise until getting married. It wasn't BECAUSE I got married that this problem came about, it was just a side affect of doing so....kind of like gaining weight.

When I was single, it seemed that there was always someone to hang out with and there were always ears that had a burning desire to hear what the Lord was teaching. This was a blessing for me because I always had an opportunity to share how he was filling up my cup and an opportunity to pour it out to others so that he would fill it up once again afresh and anew.

Oh, how I have seen that the things in our cup can become stagnant and gross. It's not that the Lord is not willing to refill our cups, it is that He needs somewhere to put the things he wants to give us and we must pour some of that stuff out to others for him to refill it.

Here is my opportunity to share those things.

SOOOOO.....the first thing I would love to share with you is.....GOD IS GOOD. As I have been very adamant about growing closer to Him these past few weeks, He has begun a process in me that is getting me on the right track for that spiritual growth I so desperatly need.

I would like to note that, not unlike many others I have spoken to; God gives me bits of personal wisdom in 3's. I am certain that He realizes I am too stupid to pick up on things the 1st time, so... long ago he started this wonderful process of revealing things to me in 3's.

This past week he has given me the task of "finding myself". It all started with the Bible Study we are doing for Mom's Touch called, "What Every Mom Needs." The chapter we were to do is called, "Identity." As you might be able to tell from the title, this was about how mothers have a tendancy to get wrapped up in caring for others and how important it is that we don't get lost in that and that we find out who WE are apart from all that we DO and all the titles we possess.

Second was a devotional that landed in my inbox from Proverbs 31 ministries. What was so interesting about this is that in my search for spiritual growth recently, I felt the Lord calling me to sign up for a devotional to be sent to my e-mail (the FREE and endless alternative to a devotional book.) I had been asking for some direction in my quiet time and felt that this was where the Lord was leading me. All that said; I had only done this the DAY before this particular devotional arrived in my inbox.....talk about divine timing. This devotional called, "The Real Me," by Renee Swope was about how important it is to take time to find out who we are as individuals. Ok, so this seems to be starting some sort of pattern here.

THEN, the 3rd and so far, final addition to this pattern was the marriage conference I attended this weekend. One of the sessions in this conference was aptly called, "Caring For Self," which was all about how we can't give what we don't have and the importance of taking care of oneself.

It was obvious at this point that the Lord was calling me to do some dirty work in my life.....really do a good scrubbing on my heart and get to work. He was clearly asking me to figure out who I am. I didn't even realize this needed to be done until all of this came about.

Thank you Jesus for being faithful to answer the prayers of our hearts. If I had not been seeking spiritual growth; I am certain that He would not have revealed this to me at this time!

The beginning of deprivation!

As I do the Beth Moore Bible study on "Daniel" I am painfully aware of the the numerous choices we have in this culture....many that we were never intended to have. Yet, then I wonder if we were in fact meant to have them and to simply turn from them to show who we are truly following! This Bible study has been wonderful motivation for the "lifestyle change" that Josh and I started on Monday. I say "lifestyle change" because this is what I desire for it to be, but the truth is, we are involved in a weight loss challenge.

We both have "let ourselves go" and are ready to regain control. We have weight to lose but more than that we now have a daughter to model for.

The first day was not bad except for the splitting headache from the lack of caffeine that my body had become accustomed to getting. I don't know how good I will do eating vegetables but at least I can limit my calorie intake and workout a bit. I did both of these things on Monday so I was pretty happy with myself.

I am still struggling with "pregnant belly" so I would love to get rid of that. I took "before" pictures this morning, which turned out to be pretty depressing. I can't wait for the "after" pics!